fine-tuning

It’s been 4 years since I started thinking about getting a master degree on something and almost 7 weeks since I got to The Netherlands, pursuing the master degree I’ve ever dreamed of. It is not exaggeration to say that it is a big leap for me, both in terms of personal and career development. I’ve never been living too far for too long from my families and friends in this last 29 years, nor have I been taking care of domestic and non-domestic things at the same time within the time period. But that’s the hard parts I’ve been expecting.

What I don’t expect is that the fact that I miss working.

It’s been 6,5 years from my graduation on March 2008 and 6 years since my first real job of going to the office regularly (or say, having a regular earning from what I do). Going back to school definitely forces me to do some hasty mindset fine-tuning. Hehe. But as I decided to pursue a higher education, I also tried to predict the adjustments I’m going to have as soon as I’m quitting my job.

I have full consciousness that I’m going to lose my salary, current career opportunities, chances to explore and designing for “happening” things in my hometown, and I might also going to lose clients (or colleagues).

 “Is it hard for you to go back studying after working so long?”
“How do you adjust yourself to a campus life after some time?”
“Don’t you miss working?”
are the question I had a lot from my classmates after knowing that I was working for such a long time before.

And I always answer, yes, it’s not easy for me to switch my state of mind to being a student again after all of this time. It’s not. Really.

No matter how hard we’ve prepared ourselves, there would be (as I quote from Les Miserables) the storms we cannot weather. Now, for those who are still wondering why it wouldn’t be so easy, or those who are still in doubt about what’s coming if you ever study abroad, here’s some comparison that might help.

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Now having that to be written, the thing that annoys me the most now is the fact that I have to comply to such rules and schedules again. I miss the (sense of) freedom I got when I was working. But just then I managed to see it more this way: why not assume all of the lectures I have to attend as a regular meeting with clients (which I had to attend as well) and see weekdays as the same thing, i.e. the days I have to go to work? Maybe then I can work to a rhythm I’ve known for such a long time after all. Let’s see if it works out. 😉

I like it here.

So every time I thought that I’m not gonna survive the next two years, I keep telling myself to take it easy. “Come on, this is only your 1st month here. Adaptation is common.” I really hope I can stop telling me that sh*t next month. Hahaha.

And for them who’s still in doubt if they should go back to school or not, don’t be too hard to yourself. Just give it some time. I learned it the hard way, no matter how hard you try, what’s yours will always be yours, and what’s not won’t. 😉

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